What I Want

Taking the last three steps at a run, Justin whipped around the corner and grabbed the phone from the hook. “Hello?”


On the verge of speaking, Justin changed his mind and waited to hear what Brian would say next.

“I’m coming to pick you up in an hour. Be ready.”

Confused Justin asked, “Why?” Although he couldn’t see him, Justin knew Brian was probably either scowling in dismay or raising an eyebrow in amusement.

“The raincheck on your birthday present.”

With all that had happened since Brian had promised to take him on a ‘date’ for his birthday, the teen had been sure that Brian had forgotten or would be too busy. “It’s okay. You don’t have to.”

“Yes. I do.” Pause. “I should be able to keep at least one promise.”

So this wasn’t just about Justin’s birthday date, it was about Lindsay yelling at Brian, “Don’t tell me you’ll be there for him and then you’re not!” It was about his father and all of the promises he had made, promises he had had no intention of keeping. And, lastly, it was about Brian finding a way to be at peace with himself. “Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise. And wear something nice. No jeans and no t-shirts.”

Justin grimaced and his eyes widened. “I have to wear a suit?”

“Did your mother pick your suits out for you?”

Hating to admit it, Justin concurred. “Yeah.”

“Then, no. That’d be cruel and unusual punishment. For me. Just wear a pair of slacks and a sweater. One hour.”

“’kay.” As usual, Brian didn’t say good-bye, just hung up. Gradually Justin was getting used to that. Not that Brian called him very much. Hardly ever, in fact. But he was just as bad in person. Rushing back upstairs, Justin racked his brains over what to wear. He knew that if the ad-exec and self-professed clothes horse didn’t approve of his outfit, Brian would send him back upstairs to change while he fumed in the jeep.

A palmful of styling gel applied seemingly haphazardly, Brian raked and arranged his hair with his fingers until he gave the impression that he had just rolled out of bed. He found it useful in his line of work to radiate an air of carnal sensuousness. A client who was thinking about sex was a client in the mood to be sold something. And if the client was thinking about having sex with Brian and was willing to buy his ideas, so much the better.

He stood back and surveyed his handiwork. The cream-colored cashmere and silk-blend sweater paired with close-fitting chocolate trousers emphasized his lean torso and slender hips to perfection. Justin would have a difficult time keeping his hands off of him. Course, he always did, no matter what Brian was wearing or not wearing at the time. Licking his lips, he left the bathroom, grabbed his tan overcoat from the closet, keys and wallet from the counter, and exited the loft with one last backwards glance at his preparations. Perfect.

Justin fidgeted on the stoop, seeing the jeep in every set of head lights that came up the street. He would have waited inside but he didn’t want Brian to have to idle in the jeep for even a second—Brian hated waiting. Besides, Debbie and Vic had been driving him crazy, teasing him about his plans for the evening. They found it incredibly amusing that their Sunshine was going out on a real date, even if it was with Brian. They had tormented him so much that he had finally given up and come outside to freeze his nuts off. Counting grievances against the old folks, Justin didn’t see Brian until the jeep came to a screeching halt. He ran down the walkway and got in.

Seemingly lazily, Brian looked him over, sharp eyes taking in every detail. Blue-grey Calvin Klein sweater, black trousers, Doc Martens. He smiled to let Justin know he approved and pulled off from the curb like a jet fighter leaving an aircraft carrier.

From over the top of the menu Justin said, “Everyone’s looking at us.”

Brian glanced around without really seeing anyone—or seeing everyone and discounting them all— then turned his attention back to the listed dinner entrees. “You’ll get used to it.”

“Why do you think they’re staring?”

Without looking up Brian replied, “We’re the best-looking and best-dressed couple in the place.”

That Brian could say things like that and mean it constantly amazed Justin. Other people only allowed themselves to think the things that Brian routinely said without hesitation or self-censorship. Which was why it had shocked him to find out that Brian hadn’t told his parents he was gay because he had been afraid of their disapproval and not because they didn’t have anything to do with his life, which was what he had told Justin. The teen guessed that there were a lot of things about Brian that he didn’t know and the more he found out about him, the less he felt he knew him. His picture of Brian kept shifting and he could never at any point know with any degree of certainty just what Brian would do in a given situation. Like tonight. Their first real date. Peering over the edge of the menu, Justin studied Brian’s lowered head. Could feel the spikes of hair beneath his fingers. Although they were stiff, they were also surprisingly soft. Sometimes when they were making love he found himself grabbing Brian’s hair for purchase, to keep himself grounded. Sensing Justin’s scrutiny, Brian looked up and cocked his head waiting for Justin to explain.

“Thanks for tonight.”

Brian grinned. “Thank me later.”

The waiter appeared at Brian’s side. “May I get you something from the bar?”

Justin felt the tips of his ears grow warm. If Brian ordered a drink and he did too and got carded and they called him on his fake ID…

“I’ll have a virgin daiquiri.”

Eyes grown wide, Justin stared across the table at his dinner companion fully expecting Brian to have been replaced by a badly-dressed body snatcher.

“And you, sir?” he asked, his tone implying that he considered Justin to be anything but a ‘sir.’

Finding his voice, Justin croaked, “I’ll have a virgin margarita.”

The waiter smirked. “Two virgins,” and went to put in their order.

Brian eased back in his chair and closed his menu. “That guy’s tip is gonna be smaller than his dick.”

“You could have ordered a real drink,” said Justin.

“I want to remember tonight.”

“You mean you don’t remember every moment we’ve ever spent together?”

Deftly avoiding that trap, Brian replied, “Tonight’s special. After all,” he confessed, “this is only the second date I’ve ever been on.”

“What? Tonight?” asked the waiter who had returned with their drinks.

Brian’s eyes hardened. “Do I know you?” Justin tensed, hearing the tightness in Brian’s voice.

The waiter must have sensed the precariousness of his position as well. “I’m sorry. It was just a joke.”

“I didn’t realize it was Amateur Night.” Brian lifted his menu and handed it to the waiter without looking at him. “Venison.”

All business now, the waiter jotted down his order. “Yes, sir.” To Justin, “And you, sir?”

He glanced down at the menu in a panic. He had studied it for ten minutes and still hadn’t made up his mind.

“If you’re not ready, we can order an appetizer and he can come back later.”

Justin spotted a dish with relief. “Rabbit. I’ll have the rabbit.”

The waiter gathered his menu. “Will there be anything else?”

Brian reached for his drink, the waiter already forgotten so Justin shook his head, releasing the guy. As the waiter scurried away, Justin couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for him. Having been exposed to more than one of Brian’s cool breezes, he figured the waiter got off lucky.

“To you,” said Brian lifting his drink.

Justin raised his glass. “To me.” A clink and they drank, eyes connecting over the rims of their drinks. “So,” he began, “tell me about your first date.”

Eyes suddenly sparkling, Brian revealed the source of his amusement. “I ended up fucking the waiter. I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

On cue the waiter appeared with a basket of flatbreads. Left.

Tongue in cheek, Brian held up two fingers about two inches apart. Justin laughed and nearly spilled his drink. “Maybe they got the order wrong,” Brian joked. He held out his hand, a languid movement that caught and held the eye. “Let me taste.” Justin passed the glass to him, watched as Brian lifted it to his mouth and took a sip. Slowly licked his lips clean of any liquid. A man at the next table over watched Brian’s tongue make the circuit with more than an idle interest. Of course, Justin didn’t notice, his eyes were glued to the performance which Brian staged as if they were alone in his loft. Justin’s trousers began to tighten in the crotch. He shifted in his seat and gulped down about half a goblet of water.

The entire meal became an exercise in eroticism with most of the other diners looking on longingly as the two men whet one another’s appetite with subtle and not-so-subtle displays of desire and need. At one point during the main course Brian reached over and wiped a drop of pomegranate sauce from Justin’s lower lip—where it hung poised to fall onto his sweater—and then sucked the sauce from his fingertip. At which point a woman at a nearby table excused herself and, as she passed by them on her way to the Ladies’ Room, whispered, “Fucking hot.”

Justin smiled, his lip smeared red. Brian’s eyelids lowered over his smoldering, hazel eyes.

As Justin finished the final bit of rabbit left on his plate, Brian signaled their waiter. “The check.”

In the jeep Justin reached over and unzipped Brian’s trousers, reached in and stroked his cock. Brian sighed and gripped the wheel tighter as Justin maintained a steady rhythm. Finally he clamped his hand over Justin’s and held it still while his heart continued to race.

The elevator shook as they wrestled one another, embroiled in hard, deep kissing, mouths open and mashed against one another, tongues thrusting. The skin near Justin’s mouth was wet with Brian’s saliva.

Brian turned the key in the lock and then placed his hands over Justin’s eyes. “Don’t peek. Open the door.” They stepped over the threshold, Brian pressed up against Justin out of necessity. “Okay.” He removed his hands.

It was not to be believed. There on the dining table was a vase of Stargazer Lilies,
a white-frosted cake sprinkled with purple candied hydrangea,
and a decanter of deep burgundy wine.
And through the open doorway of Brian’s bedroom, Justin could see clear votives lining the countertop that ran along the perimeter of the room.

But best of all, on an easel behind the dining table, was a drawing. Of him and Brian. Him lying asleep in Brian’s arms.


“One of the artists from the show at the Center. It’s not as good as yours but—” Justin hugged him hard, nearly bowling him over. Kissing him below the ear, Brian released him. “Go check it out. See if you got my money’s worth.” While Justin examined the portrait Brian closed the door and put on some music. The piece had a definite pumping beat but the tempo was just perfect for slow dancing. Crossing to where Justin stood admiring their likeness, Brian wrapped his arms around him. “Wanna dance?”

Staring out about six inches apart, they continued to move closer and closer together until their bellies and groins were grinding together in time to the music. Brian teased them, rubbing his face on Justin’s neck and face, his purring lips brushing over his skin, promising everything, then flitting away before any could be kept. Finally, in frustration, Justin grabbed the back of Brian’s head and drew him down for a serious kiss that left them hard and breathless. Brian cupped Justin’s crotch and gently squeezed his growing erection.

“Ah!” exclaimed Justin, falling back against the counter. Like a whirlwind, Brian had torn open his trousers and dragged them down his hips, his thighs. Justin stepped out of them and his underwear and kicked off his shoes before Brian pushed him back, lifted his sweater, and began planting kisses on the smooth skin of his belly, his lips trailing down into the blond thatch of hair from which sprang his cock. Instead of taking it into his mouth, Brian licked the tip slowly, allowing his tongue to cup and caress the broad head while Justin’s heart rate increased as did his involuntary cries of pleasure. Brian closed his lips about the tip and gave it a kiss. Then another. Hummed around it sending shivers up Justin’s spine. Justin groaned in the back of his throat then voiced a very contented, “Mmm,” when Brian drew him inside and began to make his way up his shaft, tracing veins from root to tip. His cock stiffened under Brian’s manipulations, his dick sending pulses to all regions of his body, causing his toes to curl, his buttocks to tense, and his nipples to tingle. As Brian sucked him off, he rubbed between Justin’s thighs, fondling his full sac, stroking the strip of flesh behind his balls, and probing between his cheeks. He licked and then used the tip of his finger to ply the folds of Justin’s asshole. As Justin grew more and more aroused, his asshole began to spasm. After each contraction came a period of relaxation and it was during these moments that Brian pressed forward, easing his finger just inside the rim of the teen’s warm hole. Justin raised his leg and let it fall over Brian’s shoulder, opening himself even wider to his partner’s erotic activities. At last Brian let him slip free. He looked down at his shiny cock, erect, hungry for more attention. He loved the way his dick looked, slick with Brian’s spit. Hotter than he had ever been before, he stripped off his sweater and let it fall onto the pile at his feet.

Brian, having shed his own constricting clothing, drew Justin to his chest and gently kneaded his plump buttocks as they kissed. “It’s your birthday. Tell me what you want.”

Cupping his palms over the mounds of Brian’s ass, Justin murmured against his mouth, “I want… I want…” How could he even say it? And yet it was what he wanted more than anything at that moment.

Amused, Brian smiled. “You want what?”

Instead of answering verbally, Justin squeezed Brian’s ass and used his fingers to probe between his cheeks.

With a raised eyebrow, Brian asked, “Are you sure you can handle it?” Justin nodded, unable to speak. His cock throbbed against Brian’s hip and he shifted, leaving a wet trail on his lover’s skin. Before he could break contact completely though, Brian took hold of his shaft and ran his thumb over the moist tip. A moan escaped his lips and he pressed his face into Brian’s shoulder. “I’m very demanding.” Smiling, he tugged on Justin’s erection. “Come on.” Still holding onto his cock, Brian lead Justin to the bedroom.

Brian laid back on the bed and opened his legs, then drew his knees up. As Justin watched, mesmerized by the play of muscles in his thighs, calves, biceps, and forearms, he raised his legs, catching each one behind the knee, exposing his buttocks and the tight hole nested between his cheeks. Crawling between his legs, Justin reached for a condom but Brian stopped him with a look. “If you want to stick it, you gotta lick it first.”

As if he had been only waiting for permission, the boy dropped to his belly with his face pressed up against Brian’s ass. With no other preamble he began to lick around Brian’s hole, his tongue circling the rosy orifice, each circuit bringing him closer and closer to the epicenter. When his tongue finally made contact dead on, Brian shuddered. Justin ravished his ass, feeding on him with a hunger that seemed endless. At each opportunity the teen pressed forward, burying his tongue deeper inside until it felt as if he had Brian’s ass completely inside his mouth. Releasing one leg, Brian reached down and lightly gripped Justin’s head as he worked his ass against his tongue and lips, all the while taking deep draughts of air.

Suddenly withdrawing his tongue, Justin turned to Brian’s balls, lapping his sac with enthusiasm before moving onto his cock. Supporting himself on his hands, he lowered his head and closed his mouth around the proffered organ which sprouted from Brian’s fist. He twisted his head as he sucked on his lover’s cock and moved up and down the shaft in an easy glide. Finally, he gave him a last lick and sat up. His cock was so hard he was afraid to breath. Brian reached over and opened the condom, unrolled it over Justin’s cock. “Hold out your hand.” When Justin complied, he squeezed lube onto his fingers. Needing no other instructions, Justin took one of Brian’s legs in his hands and held it up and open. Brian’s head rolled back on the pillow as Justin’s fingers sank into his hole. And then his dick slipped inside.

The thrill of being inside Brian nearly drove Justin over the edge. But Brian held him still until his pulse had slowed a little and he could see straight again. “Slowly,” Brian cautioned. “I want a long, hard ride.” His hands slid down over Justin’s ass. “Now, come all the way in.” Justin pressed forward until he was buried to the hilt. He couldn’t believe how good it felt to be inside of Brian. Lowering his head, he gave him a kiss and felt Brian’s muscles grip him. He moaned. Brian flicked his tongue over Justin’s open lips while his ass continued to massage his cock. Saliva dripped from Justin’s mouth onto Brian’s face. Placing his hands on either side of Justin’s head, Brian kissed him hard, then whispered, “Now.”

Slowly, at first, Justin began to move, sliding in and out of him with a minimum of hesitation, his buttocks tensing as he dipped down to drive his cock deep into Brian’s ass. As they fucked, Justin could feel Brian’s hips rising to meet his thrusts, could feel Brian’s asshole opening wider, as if he couldn’t get enough of the teen’s cock, as if he wanted all of it, balls and all. Shifting, Justin got on his knees and held Brian’s legs open, pounding his ass with abandon, hitting Brian’s prostate with each stroke, wanting it to go on forever but feeling that tingling at the base of his spine which told him that he was coming. Brian’s mouth opened and he groaned and that sent Justin over the edge. Hips moving at a blur, he made that final push and cried out shooting his load. He jerked against Brian a few more times then slumped over him. When he was able to breath again and was capable of rational thought, he pulled out and laid next to Brian, his hand stroking his nipple. “You didn’t come.”

Brian smiled softly. “I will. You’re not finished yet. Look in the nightstand.” Justin turned over and opened the drawer, withdrew a ten-inch, flexible, synthetic dildo. “I told you I like a long, hard ride.”

Kneeling on the bed, Justin squatting behind him, Brian whispered, “Slide it in.” His lips still stretched from the fucking Justin had given him, Brian’s ass easily accommodated the dildo, although it had a few inches on Justin both in girth and length. Head thrown back, he raised and lowered his hips, drawing his ass along the length of the dildo while Justin held it steady. “Work it in me,” he commanded, and Justin obeyed, using one hand to thrust while the other held onto Brian’s hip. Gripping the plastic cock with his ass, Brian jerked his hips, the muscles in his legs taut, his cock bouncing in front of him, a line of precum flung across his thigh like a shiny streamer. He leaned forward and instructed Justin to withdraw the dildo and then shove it back into him. Justin complied, forcing a cry from Brian as the dildo filled the suddenly emptied space in his ass. “Again.” At Brian’s insistence, Justin repeated the action. This time Brian gave a long, low groan and jerked. His cock throbbed and frothed. Justin, holding the dildo tight up against him, reached around and cupped his dick. Another contraction and Justin’s palm was wet with cum. He stroked Brian’s dick, spreading cum along the shaft, while Brian continued to convulse.

He awoke with Justin’s arms around his waist, his head between his shoulder blades. Smiling, Brian turned over. Justin, disturbed by the movement, grumbled and opened his eyes. “Hey.”

Justin returned his smile. “Hey.”

Brian looked over Justin’s shoulder at the clock. “It’s still your belated birthday. What else do you want?”

Eyes sparkling, Justin replied, “Cake.”

“Okay. But first,” and at that Brian reached over him and opened the top drawer of the nightstand, taking out a small, exquisitely wrapped present. “Here. Happy Birthday.”

Justin straddled Brian and took the box. “But you got me the sketch…”

Lips curled, Brian said, “I can afford it. Open it.”

The grey wrapping appeared to be cloth. “Is this silk?”


Confused, Justin asked, “Why would you wrap a present in silk?”

Brian laughed. “Presentation is everything. That’s the first thing you learn in advertising. The other is sometimes getting to something is more important than the thing itself. That’s what advertising is all about. Making you want something so badly it hurts. No matter what it is.”

Carefully, Justin undid the twisted paper bow and removed the silk wrapping. He stopped before opening the small, ebony wood box.

“Go on.”

He opened the box. Inside was a gold, cowry shell pendant on a slender chain. Unable to believe his eyes, he sat staring at it.

Brian, never one to release control of a situation, removed the necklace and opened the clasp. Placed it around Justin’s neck, and fastened it. “There.” He stroked Justin’s cheek with his right hand. “Perfect.”

Justin laid his fingers upon Brian’s wrist, the cowry shell bracelet pressing against his palm. “This is the best birthday I’ve ever had.”

“You only turn eighteen once.” They kissed. “Now, we have cake.”

“Hold still.” Brian gripped the base of Justin’s cock and smiled in appreciation of his creation. The teen’s cock was completely erect, covered with white frosting, and topped with one of the candied hydrangea from the cake. Justin took a deep breath as Brian slowly extended his tongue. With a flick, he had the candy flower in his mouth. Gone in a few bites. Then he began licking the frosting from Justin’s dick in long, leisurely motions. By the time Brian was done, Justin’s cock had begun to leak and ache. Releasing him, Brian reached for the tube of violet decorating gel he had used to write Justin’s name on his cake. On his hands and knees, with his back to Justin, Brian placed the tip of the tube at the top of his ass and squeezed. Violet gel ran down between his cheeks. Tossing the tube away, Brian finger-painted his skin from his hole to his balls. His buttocks were streaked purple as well. And then he waited. It didn’t take but a moment for Justin to be there, face buried in his ass, licking him clean and eating out his hole. And after he had eaten his fill, he unrolled a condom over his cock and fucked Brian to his—and Brian’s—content. Withdrawing, he removed the condom and came over Brian’s buttocks, mixing cum with gel and frosting. Then, before Brian could blow, he thrust two fingers up his sticky hole and urged him on, twisting, swirling his fingers around until Brian shouted and dropped his load.

Kissing the back of Brian's neck, Justin asked, "So when's your birthday?"

Having showered, they returned to the disheveled bed and crawled under the covers, pleasurably exhausted. Laying on his back, Justin’s head against his chest, Brian smiled as the teen fingered the cowry shell pendant, and for the moment, he felt at peace.

Heels Over Head | Stories